Steven Wright

 I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out. 

- Steven Wright

Sigmund Freud

 I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father's protection. 

- Sigmund Freud

John Lennon

 As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot. 

- John Lennon

Mark Twain

 The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year. 

- Mark Twain

Clint Eastwood

 They say marriages are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning. 

- Clint Eastwood

Dolly Parton

 We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails. 

- Dolly Parton

Thomas A. Edison

 Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean it's useless. 

- Thomas A. Edison

Pablo Picasso

 It takes a long time to become young. 

- Pablo Picasso

Robin Williams

 Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose. 

- Robin Williams

Yogi Berra

 A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore. 

- Yogi Berra

Geoffrey Chaucer

 The greatest scholars are not usually the wisest people. 

- Geoffrey Chaucer

Confucius

 Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance. 

- Confucius

Sophia Loren

 You have to enjoy life. Always be surrounded by people that you like, people who have a nice conversation. There are so many positive things to think about. 

- Sophia Loren

Socrates

 He is richest who is content with the least, for content is the wealth of nature. 

- Socrates

John Lennon

 I don't believe in killing whatever the reason! 

- John Lennon