Ellen Degeneres

If we don't want to define ourselves by things as superficial as our appearances, we're stuck with the revolting alternative of being judged by our actions.
- Ellen Degeneres

Optimist: A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
- Ambrose Bierce

Goethe

"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it."
- Goethe

Albert Camus

A man without ethics is a wild beast loosed upon this world.
- Albert Camus

John Sullivan

I sure hope there is a Heaven, and the people who were the most selfish are the ones that have to wait the longest to get into it.
- John Sullivan

William C. Bryant

Truth gets well if she is run over by a locomotive, while error dies of lockjaw if she scratches her finger.
- William C. Bryant

Dorothy Parker

Why is it no one ever sent me yet one perfect limousine, do you suppose? Ah no, it's always just my luck to get one perfect rose.
- Dorothy Parker

Jef Raskin

Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
- Jef Raskin

Ed Gardner

Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.
- Ed Gardner

William Hazlitt

Without the aid of prejudice and custom I should not be able to find my way across the room.
- William Hazlitt

Dr. Martin Henry Fischer

Half of the modern drugs could well be thrown out of the window, except that the birds might eat them.
- Dr. Martin Henry Fischer

Babe Ruth

I have only one superstition. I touch all the bases when I hit a home run.
- Babe Ruth

James Baldwin

People who treat other people as less than human must not be surprised when the bread they have cast on the waters comes floating back to them, poisoned.
- James Baldwin 1924-1987, American Author

Edward Abbey

When the philosopher's argument becomes tedious, complicated, and opaque, it is usually a sign that he is attempting to prove as true to the intellect what is plainly false to common sense.
- Edward Abbey

Rabindranath Tagore

"You can't cross a sea by merely staring into the water."
- Rabindranath Tagore

Hubert H. Humphrey

"In real life, unlike in Shakespeare, the sweetness of the rose depends upon the name it bears. Things are not only what they are. They are, in very important respects, what they seem to be."
- Hubert H. Humphrey (1911 - 1978)

Ric Brown

It will eventually kill me if I live long enough.
- Ric Brown

H. L. Mencken

It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man.
- H. L. Mencken

Bernard Berenson

Consistency requires you to be as ignorant today as you were a year ago.
- Bernard Berenson

Frank Zappa

Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.
- Frank Zappa

Damon Runyon

You can become a winner only if you are willing to walk over the edge.
- Damon Runyon

Confucius

I will not be concerned at other men's not knowing me; I will be concerned at my own want of ability.
- Confucius

Simon Cameron

The honest politician is one who, when he is bought, stays bought.
- U.S. Senator Simon Cameron (1862)

Alan Minter

Sure, there have been deaths and injuries in boxing, but none of them serious.
- Alan Minter

Calvin Trillin

Health food makes me sick.
- Calvin Trillin

George Bernard Shaw

Virtue is insufficient temptation.
- George Bernard Shaw

Albert Einstein

An empty stomach is not a good political adviser.
- Albert Einstein

Mark Twain

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
- Mark Twain