Nicole Hollander

Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women.
- Nicole Hollander

John Updike

What art offers is space, a certain breathing room for the spirit.
- John Updike

Rodney Dangerfield

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.
- Rodney Dangerfield

Bill Maher

Suicide is man's way of telling God, "You can't fire me - I quit."
- Bill Maher

James Allen

"You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you."
- James Allen

Pericles

What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others.
- Pericles

Isaac Asimov

I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.
- Isaac Asimov

Euripides

In goodness there are all kinds of wisdom.
- Euripides

Jules de Gaultier

Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.
- Jules de Gaultier

Carl Sagan

A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism.
- Carl Sagan

Jean-Luc Picard

"Things are only impossible until they're not."
- Jean-Luc Picard

George Winters

"If God had really intended men to fly, he'd make it easier to get to the airport."
- George Winters

Ambrose Bierce

Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.
- Ambrose Bierce

Martin Luther King Jr.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."
- Martin Luther King Jr.

Josh Billings

Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.
- Josh Billings

John F. Kennedy

Physical fitness is not only one of the most important keys to a healthy body, it is the basis of dynamic and creative intellectual activity.
- John F. Kennedy

Abraham Lincoln

"Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."
- Abraham Lincoln

Lord Alfred Tennyson

Who is wise in love, love most, say least.
- Lord Alfred Tennyson

H. L. Mencken

Criticism is prejudice made plausible.
- H. L. Mencken

Ralph Waldo Emerson

"The first wealth is health."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Robert Orben

What bothers me about TV is that it tends to take our minds off our minds.
- Robert Orben

Albert Einstein

A table, a chair, a bowl of fruit and a violin; what else does a man need to be happy?
- Albert Einstein

Buddha

In a controversy the instant we feel anger we have already ceased striving for the truth, and have begun striving for ourselves.
- Buddha

Groucho Marx

"It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy."
- Groucho Marx

Plato

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.
- Plato

Confucius

Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.
- Confucius

George Bernard Shaw

An election is a moral horror, as bad as a battle except for the blood; a mud bath for every soul concerned in it.
- George Bernard Shaw

Oscar Wilde

Morality, like art, means drawing a line someplace.
- Oscar Wilde

Will Rogers

It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.
- Will Rogers

Sir Winston Churchill

"The reserve of modern assertions is sometimes pushed to extremes, in which the fear of being contradicted leads the writer to strip himself of almost all sense and meaning."
- Sir Winston Churchill

Mark Twain

Never put off till to-morrow what you can do the day after to-morrow just as well.
- Mark Twain