Kin Hubbard

A good listener is usually thinking about something else.
- Kin Hubbard

Jim Bishop

Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over a million dollar Stradivarius to a gorilla.
- Jim Bishop

George Burns

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
- George Burns

James Whistler

If other people are going to talk, conversation becomes impossible.
- James Whistler

William Goldman

"Life isn't fair. It's just fairer than death, that's all."
- William Goldman

Lord Byron

Man's love is of man's life a part, it is a woman's whole existence. In her first passion, a woman loves her lover, in all the others all she loves is love.
- Lord Byron

Sir Francis Bacon

"There is no excellent beauty that hath not some strangeness in the proportion."
- Sir Francis Bacon

Dan Fallon

You don't have to accept the invitation to get angry. Instead, practice forgiveness, empathy and encouragement.
- Dan Fallon

Navajo legend

“In the skin of our fingers we can see the trail of the wind; it shows us where the wind blew when our ancestors were created.”
- Navajo legend

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Certain flaws are necessary for the whole. It would seem strange if old friends lacked certain quirks.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Hank Aaron

My motto was always to keep swinging. Whether I was in a slump or feeling badly or having trouble off the field, the only thing to do was keep swinging.
- Hank Aaron

George Sand

Admiration and familiarity are strangers.
- George Sand

Elizabeth Stone

Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.
- Elizabeth Stone

Emo Philips

New York's such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guys are very rude. I said, "I'd like a card." He says, "You have to prove you're a citizen of New York." So I stabbed him.
- Emo Philips

Warren Beatty

There are some people whom you have in life who have the capacity for real, passionate commitment to something, and sometimes you may be passionately committed to the same thing.
- Warren Beatty

Tao Te Ching

Just stay at the center of the circle and let all things take their course.
- Tao Te Ching

Doug Larson

"If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend."
- Doug Larson

Stephen Jay Gould

"In science, 'fact' can only mean 'confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent.' I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms."
- Stephen Jay Gould

Ludwig Wittgenstein

"Philosophy is a battle against the bewitchment of our intelligence by means of language."
- Ludwig Wittgenstein

Johann von Neumann

"You wake me up early in the morning to tell me I am right? Please wait until I am wrong."
- Johann von Neumann

Nancy Kerrigan

Part of being a champ is acting like a champ. You have to learn how to win and not run away when you lose. Everyone has bad stretches and real successes. Either way, you have to be careful not to lose your confidence or get to confident.
- Nancy Kerrigan

Steven Wright

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.
- Steven Wright

Leonid S. Sukhorukov

To lead others, embody their ideals!
- Leonid S. Sukhorukov

C. S. Lewis

[One] can regard the moral law as an illusion, and so cut himself off from the common ground of humanity.
- C. S. Lewis

Voltaire

The discovery of what is true and the practice of that which is good are the two most important objects of philosophy.
- Voltaire (Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire)

Richard Cobden

The progress of freedom depends more upon the maintenance of peace, the spread of commerce, and the diffusion of education, than upon the labours of cabinets and foreign offices.- Richard Cobden

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

If spring came but once a century instead of once a year, or burst forth with the sound of an earthquake and not in silence, what wonder and expectation there would be in all hearts to behold the miraculous change.
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Confucius

Speak the truth, do not yield to anger; give, if thou art asked for little; by these three steps thou wilt go near the gods.
- Confucius

Tao Te Ching

Not-knowing is true knowledge. Presuming to know is a disease. First realize that you are sick, then you can move toward health.
- Tao Te Ching

Mae West

Those who are easily shocked... should be shocked more often.
- Mae West